What's the point?

Sometimes I wonder why I take the time to do a blog like this. It must be the same motivation that's behind starting (and maintaining) a diary. Maybe it's different for those who can write things that are interesting to others. Maybe it's different to actually have something of value, something of substance to put in a blog. I just want to be me. I don't want to make up lofty sounding phrases. I don't want to put a fiction here and call it truth. I just want to put some thoughts down. To be able to read back through the wordstream and see if I can detect a sense of who I am from those words alone.

Tornado Video

Finally got to see portions of my tornado video used in an episode of Twist of Fate on The Weather Channel. Too cool to see it and on a national outlet. TWC even sent me a DVD of the entire episode last week. I have to say I did enjoy my fifteen minutes of fame. Now, back to reality. :)

May Flowers

I suppose we're all a bit lucky to have flowers of any sort to enjoy when considering the tornado that swept through Lee County and Sanford last month on the 16th. So many people have lost everything they have, some have lost homes, some have lost jobs and workplaces. It's been a trying time for many. For myself and family, we were spared. Since that fateful Saturday afternoon I have tried to get around and capture some of the scenes but it's pretty heartrending to see the devestation. It's almost as if you're intruding on something highly private to line up a photograph that shows the loss of others.
As for my video of the storm, I was priviliged enough to be interviewed by NBC/WeatherChannel on it, but with the susquent Tuscaloosa storm and it's almost Biblical proportions, my efforts pale in comparison to what others were able to film down there. Sigh. My fifteeen minutes of fame was reduced to seven and a half. ;)

Sanford Tornado

I've always wondered what a tornado actually sounded like. A week ago on April 16th I heard that sound. An F3 tornado came crashing through the St. Andrews community just outside of Sanford and chewed it's way through the Jonesboro township on then on out through the Poplar Springs area before heading  across the Cape Fear River and beyond.
The sound was unreal. I'd always head it was like a train...but to me it was exactly like several large jet engines lined up and throttling up at the same time. I was even able to snare a few minutes of video of the storm. There was a moment or two when I began thinking I was way too close for safety, but it passed four or five city blocks to the south of me on it's way to devestate the  local Tractor Supply and Lowe's Home Improvement Center.

Now that I've seen and heard one, I'd just as soon never hear nor see another for the rest of my life.

Bad Omen

This past Saturday as I was driving up HWY 17 near Hampstead, North Carolina, I came across the oddest sight. A rooftop of an abandoned home had become the roosting spot for a flock of turkey vultures. Until then I'd always seen these huge birds roost in trees if not actively ripping into a piece of road kill or circling high above a suspected meal below. This just seemed kind of unusual. So I just had to stop and take a few photographs.

Still not over it

First off I realize there are those who will read this and automatically have the advice, "Get over it...Move on" on this subject. I can only say, I have tried to "get over it" and as for moving on, to what? I am just not the kind of person who can pour my life nto a relationship for over 20 years and then change horses in the midle of the stream. I used to be that way, but marriage spoiled me. I really truly thought it would be a 'till death do we part' simply because I just knew in my heart that it would be that way. I am not "blaming" her anymore than I accept all of the blame for the marriage dying. That ending, as every part of our marriage was a joint effort. I was blind to her feelings that love could be found elsewhere. I'll accept that because that's what she did. Looked elsewhere. Which leaves me feeling as somewhat of a failure since I wasn't viewed as someone to hang onto by the woman that I thought loved me as much as I loved her. She's been gone several years now, with the man she left with, in another state and I've not seen her nor spoken to her in years. That is as she wills it as I would probably speak to or meet her for dinner at a moments notice. Sure. I know that sounds pretty pathetic since she has shown no such fidelity to me, but my heart betrays me. I just can't let go, even though there is nothing to hold onto. Overlook my ramblings. It's just that I can't talk about it to anyone without choking up, even after all of this time and the knowledge that she has bonded and blended her life with another. I simply can't bring my mind to the place I am constantly told I should be. Getting over it and moving on is a lot easier to tell someone, than it is for that someone to do. I'm living proof.

Photographs at Enrichment Center

I'm a little excited about the opportunity to hang a couple of my photographs in the Enrichment Center along with other members of the Sanford Area Photography Club. I've only been a member for a few months and have to say it's a great bunch of people in the club.
I ordered three prints from Walmart Online 5 X 7's that I've got to take the time to drive over and pick up along with frames. Always good to get some feedback on photographs. I'm only an amateur when it comes to photography but I do enjoy getting out and capturing images that I can share with others. For the most part I only share them on Flickr or my GOLO blogs (at WRAL) so this is kind of intimidating as some viewers may know me in the flesh rathert than just an anonymous name on a forum.

Hopefully I'll be able to pick up the prints Monday and hang them at the center that evening or Tuesday morning.

Winter Thunder

Seems like it's been gloomy and rainy for the past two days now. And as I write this muffled thunder is sounding off around me. Winter thunder. I know it's a sign of unsettled conditions. There's some sort of homespun wisdom that after a set number of days, snowfall will occur after winter time thunder. I've hear anywhere's from five to nine days.

Given how much it's thundering right now here in Sanford, NC the next few days ought give us a doozy of a snowstorm.

Another Friday

For myself, that doesn't carry the same weight as it does for many people. The reason for that difference is that I work a swing shift. When I started working swing shift it was an 8 hour shift way back in 1981. So much has changed since then. The place I work hasn't changed but now we have a 12 hour swing shift (7 to 7 am/pm) which does wear you down quite a bit on the "bad" days, but we have more good than bad and it works out to a seven day "long break" once a month. Basically a 28 day cycle in which you work 14 and are off 14 with the work/break sections of 4, 3 or 1 day/night duration. It may sound a little tedious and confusing but it's got it's benefits as well as it's detractions.
Being that it's Friday, I'll be going in tonight for my first of 4 consecutive "graveyards (7pm to 7am) afterwhich I'll have 3 days off. Then it'll be 3 days (7am to 7pm) followed by only a single day off. Next in the cycle will be 3 nights, followed by 3 days off (the first weekend of the cycle) and finally the work cycle is finished with 4 daylights immediately followed y 7 days off in a row! Yes, it takes a little effort to wrap your mind around all of that, but once you are submerged in the cyclicity of the schedule, it's really not to bad. You learn to accomodate.
Over the years there were a lot of things I missed out on some family happenings and activites because of work constraints, but the pay was good, the benefits were better than they are now and I'd relegated myself into believing it was 'the best I could do' at the time. Now in retrospect I often wonder, "what If"...but that kind of a mindgame does little but bring a sense of negativity around and that's the mindset I need to avoid.

Random Thoughts

I've been meaning to start blogging here for quite a while but never really put my mind to it.  Blogging should be second nature to me as I blog almost daily in a couple of local forums. This seems different somehow. Not sure exactly how to describe the difference. Maybe because it's a new direction. That in itself is a little scary because the last few years of my life have been in far different directions than I would have expected. Family, health, finances, job...so much has changed in just a few short years.

So this also will be a 'new direction' for me and for now I have no idea where this blogging experience will lead me. I guess time will tell.